Mar 7

A Girl is giving directions to her new boyfriend to get to her apartment.

She says: “You come to the front door of the apartment complex where I
live and look for apartment 14A, and with your elbow push button 14A.
Come inside and you’ll find the elevator on the right. With your elbow
hit 14. When you get out of the elevator you’ll find my apartment on
the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell and I’ll open the door for you”

The boyfriend says: “Dear, that sounds very easy to find, but why am I
hitting all these buttons with my elbow ?”

“Oh my God!! You’re not coming empty-handed, are you?”

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Feb 15

  1. India never invaded any country in her last 1000 years of history.
  2. India invented the Number system. Zero was invented by Aryabhatta.
  3. The world’s first University was established in Takshila in 700BC. More than 10,500 students from all over the world studied more than 60 subjects. The University of Nalanda built in the 4th century BC was one of the greatest achievements of ancient India in the field of education.
  4. According to the Forbes magazine, Sanskrit is the most suitable language for computer software.
  5. Ayurveda is the earliest school of medicine known to humans.
  6. Although western media portray modern images of India as poverty striken and underdeveloped through political corruption, India was once the richest empire on earth.
  7. The art of navigation was born in the river Sindh 5000 years ago. The very word “Navigation” is derived from the Sanskrit word NAVGATIH.
  8. The value of pi was first calculated by Budhayana, and he explained the concept of what is now known as the Pythagorean Theorem. British scholars have last year (1999) officially published that Budhayan’s works dates to the 6 th Century which is long before the European mathematicians.
  9. Algebra, trigonometry and calculus came from India. Quadratic equations were by Sridharacharya in the 11 th Century; the largest numbers the Greeks and the Romans used were 106 whereas Indians used numbers as big as 10 53.
  10. According to the Gemmological Institute of America, up until 1896, India was the only source of diamonds to the world.
  11. USA based IEEE has proved what has been a century-old suspicion amongst academics that the pioneer of wireless communication was Professor Jagdeesh Bose and not Marconi.
  12. The earliest reservoir and dam for irrigation was built in Saurashtra.
  13. Chess was invented in India.
  14. Sushruta is the father of surgery. 2600 years ago he and health scientists of his time conducted surgeries like cesareans, cataract,fractures and urinary stones. Usage of anaesthesia was well known in ancient India.
  15. When many cultures in the world were only nomadic forest dwellers over 5000 years ago, Indians established Harappan culture in Sindhu Valley (Indus Valley Civilisation).

These facts were recently published in a German magazine, which deals with WORLD HISTORY FACTS ABOUT INDIA.

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Feb 10

Friendship and Love defined in a single pic

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Feb 10
The Power Of Books
icon1 Gandham | icon2 Fun :D, Jokes, Pictures, hehehe | icon4 02 10th, 2008| icon31 Comment »

The Power Of Books

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Feb 9
The Husband Store
icon1 Gandham | icon2 Fun :D, Jokes, Smart | icon4 02 9th, 2008| icon3No Comments »

A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband.

Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates. You may visit the store ONLY ONCE!

There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights.


There is, however, a catch. … You may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. .

On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men have jobs and love the Lord.

*********

The second floor sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, and love kids.

*********

The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, and are extremely good looking.

” Wow,” she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

*********

She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop- dead good looking and help with the housework.

“Oh, mercy me!” she exclaims, “I can hardly stand it!”

*********

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop- dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads:

*********

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Floor 6 - You are visitor 4,363,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.

Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. Watch your step as you exit the building, and have a nice day!

*********

Share this page with all men for a good laugh and with all women who can handle the truth !

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Feb 3

Have you ever thought why…….. 1 means “one”, and 2 means “two”?

The roman numerals are easy to understand but what was the logic behind the phonecian numbers?



It’s all about angles !

 

It’s the number of angles.

If one writes the numbers down (see below) on a piece of paper in their older forms, one quickly sees why.

I have marked the angles with “o”s.

No 1 has one angle.
No 2 has two angles.
No 3 has three angles.
etc.

and “O” has no angles


Interesting, isn’t it?

 

An ancient phonecian manuscript explains this and I thought it to be fascinating

 

 

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Feb 3

Category

Rest ofIndia

Bangalore


Foot path

For pedestrians

For two-wheelers

Autos

Run on Petrol/CNG

Run on Kerosene
/LPG

Places where you can fill petrol/Diesel

Petrol Pumps

Petrol Bunks (or Banks)

How do cops stop your vehicle

Wave hand

Stand in front of the moving vehicle

Bribe paid to police if caught without documents

100 Fixed rate

100 normally, 200 or more if you are an IT/Call centre guy.

Worst Enemy

Pakistan

TamilNadu

Most Hated person

Pervez Musharraf

Deve Gowda

Reasons for rioting

Religion/ sacking of cricket player

Water

Favourite pastime of residents

Discussing why politicians suck/ why Sourav was dropped?.

Counting potholes
Front Page news How their undercover reporters exposed MP’s.(Note: Bury the story if your channel/newspaper doesn’t have the exclusive). Reporting number of Potholes especially ones that lie in the way of Mr. Narayan Murthy/ The Prasad Biddappa(who is he?) summer/winter/ monsoon fashion tips.
What News Paper editorials talk about Is dropping Ganguly good or bad for Indian cricket?. How closing pubs at 11 affect the IT industry.

English Spoken

With regional accent

With California / New York accent.

Languages Spoken

Hindi/English/ Regional

Every language on the planet.

Reasons for traffic Jams

Cows on the road

Flyover construction/ VIP visiting Infosys/ Infosys buses

Land grabbers

Mafia/Politicians

Software Firms

Historical Sites

Statues/ Buildings/ Temples

Half constructed Flyovers.

Frequent Complaints about Govt Departments

Corrupt/ Lazy etc

Don’t have websites, Emails bounce


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Feb 3
funny quotes
icon1 tejaswinita | icon2 Uncategorized | icon4 02 3rd, 2008| icon3No Comments »

” Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?”

“It’s amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world everyday always just exactly fits the newspaper.”

“If it were not for Thomas Edison, we would all be watching television in the dark.”

“Computers will never take the place of books. You can’t stand on a floppy disk to reach a high shelf.”

“An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.”

“Love is so confusing - you tell a girl she looks great and what’s the first thing you do?Turn out the lights! ”

“I don’t suffer from stress. I’m a carrier.”

“The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness and kindness, can be trained to do most things.”

“I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.”

“Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.”

“Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.”

“The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot; The guy who invented the other three, he was the genius. “

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Jan 31

HER DIARY
Day night, I thought he was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a cafe to have some coffee. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment.  Conversation wasn’t flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk, he agreed but he kept quiet and absent.  I asked him what was wrong - he said, “Nothing”. I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said it had nothing to do with me and not to worry.

On the way home I told him that I loved him, he simply smiled and kept driving.  I can’t explain his behavior; I don’t know why he didn’t say, “I love u, too”. When we got home I felt as if I had lost him, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore.
He just sat there and watched TV; He seemed distant and absent.Finally I decided to go to bed. About 10 minutes later he came to bed. I decided that I could not take it anymore, so I decided to confront him with the situation but he had fallen asleep.  I started crying and cried until I too fell asleep.  I don’t know what to do. I’m almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster……………………..

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HIS DIARY

Today India lost the cricket match against Bangladesh. DAMN IT.

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Jan 19

Herbert A. Millington
Chair - Search Committee
412A Clarkson Hall, Whitson University
College Hill, MA  34109

Dear Professor Millington,

Thank you for your letter of March 16.  After careful consideration, I
regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me
an assistant professor position in your department.

This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually
large number of rejection letters.  With such a varied and promising field
of candidates, it is impossible for me to accept all refusals.

Despite Whitson’s outstanding qualifications and previous experience in
rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my needs at
this time.  Therefore, I will assume the position of assistant professor
in your department this August.  I look forward to seeing you then.

Best of luck in rejecting future applicants.

Sincerely,
Chris L. Jensen

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